Saturday, August 16, 2008

Separation Anxiety

Keith left this morning for Missoula with the cooking crew for the firefighters. He could be back next week or he could be gone for about 6 weeks, or anywhere in between. The longest we've been apart is probably 4 days in the almost 11 years we've been together. We're pretty much always together and we like it that way. So although I know this is a good opportunity for him, it was still hard to see him leave this morning.

Yesterday was one of the first days he didn't have to be at work @ 3 a.m., so we spent the morning together, getting his things ready to pack, and then went to eat lunch at the bakery.

"Um, I think that's enough (picture-taking)."
His favorite pose lately,
I think it's very cute.
He had to shave his beard
to work in the kitchen.
So he went with a goatee,
although I was hoping for
the fu manchu.

Of course every time we have to be apart I think about it being possibly the last time I will ever see him. Things happen, you know. And that's what I am afraid of. And knowing that this is a good opportunity to make some money that will allow us to build our house when he gets back--that feeling is mitigated by the reality that we don't know what is going to happen and we can't count on the possible good outcome in the future making this "worth it."

I am usually not this pessimistic. I'm just afraid, nervous, worried. And the only thing that will help is when he gets back to me.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

:(

:(

:(

sorry. that sucks. i hope he gets back sooner than later.

be in touch! we'll entertain you while you wait.

dvl said...

reading this makes me realize how lucky i am that i DIDN'T know mannaz while he was deployed in the first gulf war... and i second what shawn said, add me to the list of dancing monkeys to entertain you while we all wait for his return. :) xoxo

April said...

Thanks peeps. How is it that people I haven't actually ever met are so good at making me feel loved?

And, yeah, I can't imagine what it's like to be married to someone who's deployed...

thanks
xoxox

Chris said...

We are having some smoke in Missoula the last couple days from the fires out your way. Hopefully that will send Keith back in your direction.

As one who is often away from my loved ones, I totally understand where you are coming from. Frankly, it never gets much better. But the reunions are always good.