Friday, July 11, 2008

Friday Freakout

My day-to-day existence here, at the New Plan, has been pretty zen (okay okay: lazy):
I eat breakfast, do some work outside, watch The Price is Right with my dad (it's an old ritual), eat lunch, try to get my Google Reader total down to less than 100, make a blog post if I have anything to blog about, do something creative, spend time with Keith and the dogs outside (until the mosquitos eat us), check in on the garden and compost bin, read before going to sleep. That's been the last month, lather rinse repeat.

Next week I start my new job. It's not the new job that is necessarily stressing me (although it will feel like The First Day of School all over again), but the idea of having to buy a car for said job. We told my parents we wanted to get by as long as possible without having a car. First, we don't have the money to buy one, let alone pay for the insurance, etc. Two, gas prices are only going up and there's no reason to think that won't continue. I can ride my bike to work, sure. It's about 2 miles on a straight and open highway. But riding on a highway does make me nervous. But my parents try to convince me I won't be able to ride my bike in the winter. I could walk, for that matter. Two miles there and back, that would get me in shape in no time. I mean, my dad tells me about the times he had to walk to Grangeville---over 30 miles. I can do 2 miles. Ok, how about the bus that runs from Kooskia to Lewiston? Maybe. Or a car that runs on something other than gas? My dream was to have a motorcycle with a sidecar that would be electric. But that will take some time. Maybe I will work on that and see if it's doable. But now that Keith is working (12 miles from here) and liking his job, temporary as it is--- he and I will have to take that into consideration, transportation-wise. Right now he's using my sister's Honda, but she'll be back from NY in August sometime and we can't afford to drive my dad's truck---too much gas, even for the short distance we need to go.

So, you see, anxiety.

Other things increasing my anxiety at a exponential rate:
  1. Threat of war with Iran. Byline: "Be very afraid, please."
  2. Congress giving immunity for telecom's who aid the NSA in warantless wiretapping
  3. Living in a small town where my library books are kept track of, in the head of the librarian
  4. Not being able to afford food, the chaos that ensues when other people can't afford food
  5. That no one else around here, other than Keith and some People on the Hill, are as concerned as I am about the way things are going
  6. That my new part-time job won't be enough income for us to build our tiny house
  7. Etc.
Keith suggests that my anxiety is heightened by the amount of time I spend on the internet. I consider it as valuable information gathering---but I can see his point. There is only so much I can do and worry about these things is not as helpful as, say, planting more food or finding alternative transportation. So I am going to try to limit how much time I am online (again!) and see if that helps. Being more proactive and less passive.

This concludes Friday Freakout. Please resume normal programming.

1 comment:

Arika said...

I know how you feel! I can't afford a car let alone all the other things that go with a car as well. It's frustrating and then I could bike to work super easy it's pretty close but I live on a street called hilltop.. which is at the top of a lot of very steep hills which makes biking home very difficult but biking there very fun. not to mention that Everything around here is on a main street and it makes me nervous as well like you to ride around there. I don't know how but my dad bikes to work and back every day... since he started his job (he started when he was 16 years old)But he's also been hit by 3 drivers and 2 public buses in that 30 year span.